Adam with John Ratzenberger, Jenn the Hot Tranny, Mike August & Andy, Teresa’s Date – May 16, 2007

CALL ADAM NOW
866-901-ADAM

6:01AM – DANNY GETS PULLED OVER, ADAM GETS COMPLIMENTED

Adam saw Danny on the way to work today, but since they took different routes, Adam figured he’d find out which one was faster. However, when Adam got to the station’s parking structure, Danny had been pulled over by the cops inside the structure. Having literally broken dozens of laws today, for some reason the cop decided not to ticket Danny.

A caller from Las Vegas calls while walking his dog to tell the show just how much he loves the show. The guy is an EMT – and Adam wants to know what sort of things he ends up dealing with. There are a couple of generalities about Vegas – like it’s filled with drugs and hookers – that make it hard to imagine normal people living there.

The caller also wants to know if Adam could ever write a book, but since Adam doesn’t read much, he’s not so sure. With the dictation software however, Danny’s adamant that he could do it in about 5 weeks.

Adam claims to shut down creatively post show, but Danny calls his bluff. Between the Man Show, Crank Yankers, the Hammer, and so on, it seems that Adam actually is a constantly creative person.

Still on a cop theme, Adam wants to know what works to get out of a ticket, either from a cop or from a driver’s perspective.

6:30AM – GETTNG OUT OF A TICKET

Adam wants advice on how to get out a ticket – and not the stupid overused advice of don’t do something to get a ticket in the first place.

One cop caller suggests postponing your court date the maximum number of times so that the cop may not be able to make it. They also go over the types of things that might get you out of ticket. Adam has a question though – he got a ticket for ‘jaywalking’ through an intersection – and the guy didn’t show up when Adam contested because he knew it was a chicken-ass ticket.

Adam wants to know how the West Hollywood cops feel about the ‘gay’ flag on the side of the cruisers, but the cop caller has no comment so Adam explains. Adam’s been told that this mosaic of the gay flag is actually in the shape of West Hollywood – but he’s not buying that for a second. Check out wehosherriff.com to see examples.

Brian does some quick research on Wikipedia, but Adam’s issue isn’t with the flag or the shape – it’s one group trying to represent the entire community.

6:54AM – WAYS TO GET OUT OF A TICKET

Between the license plate frames, bumper stickers, and the cartoon characters peeing on things, there are certain things that are just bound to piss people off. Danny especially, realized that the fans of the last radio show he was on

Teresa got pulled over on her way to therapist, but upon sobbing to the guy that she was having an anxiety attack and was on her way to the therapy appointment, he let her go.

One caller has the company logo on his private vehicle, and cops seem to avoid getting the guy driving the company ride in trouble. Another guy knows about a club you can get into, the 11-99 club, by donating a substantial amount to the CHP pension fund. Caller Ricky carries a cop training manual in his car. John, an on-duty cop, explains the situation for cops getting pulled over – you flash your badge and normally get out of it. The only thing he disagrees with thus far: if you’re a beautiful woman, you automatically get a ticket since you already got a break from God.

7:19AM – JOHN RATZENBERGER

John, known from Cheers and, has popped up on the phone line, so Adam and the gang chat with him about his show, Made in America, his life, his outlook on American schools, and a couple other topics.

Much of the conversation centers on the general American expectation that you grow up and go to college – when in fact, many people don’t. The fact of the matter is that we need to be able to teach people trades as well, since many people aren’t meant for office work either. Some people are good at crunching numbers, others are good with their hands – we need to send them in an appropriate direction post high school.

7:42AM – TERESA REPORTS THE NEWS

Teresa reports the news

8:02AM – SCREENING FOR T’S V

Mike August is on the phone to talk about Teresa’s dating – Mike has set Teresa up with Andy – who is on the phone for some group prescreening and apparently has some sort of professional relationship with Adam. Quick recap of the screening session: he saved a mutt from the pound, took his mother on a cruise, is Jewish, and is never married at 42.

After describing his proposed date plans – cocktails – with Teresa, Adam and Danny discuss the pros and cons of this guy. A caller is worried about this guy though – why is he single at 42?

As the phone lines light up with women red-lighting this guy, Adam throws in his two cents: if you’re afraid to date someone because of their past, you may never date at all.

8:30AM – CRANK YANKERS AND THE WALKING DAUGHTER

Adam plays another Crank Yanker call by Jimmy Kimmel’s young son, Kevin before explaining the breakthrough he had with his daughter last night.

His daughter has started walking a few steps here and there, but if you stand too far away, she won’t come to you. So Adam busts out the string cheese last night, and using it like a carrot on a stick got her to walk across the entire office floor.

8:48AM – JENN THE HOT TRANNY

Jenn the tranny from Arizona calls in to give a little more history about herself. Apparently, she was inspired to become a man by watching the Man Show.

Jenn’s talked to her fiancé about sleeping with Danny –and he’s actually OK’d it with one caveat: he’d like to watch. So, if Jenn sleeps with Danny, he’d also be able to report back to everybody about what it’s like having sex with a former man.

Anyway, Jenn describes the process to getting approval to become a man and possibly might be coming to LA for Danny’s bachelor party.

9:09AM – T RECAPS THE NEWS

Teresa recaps the news

9:28AM – AMERICAN IDOL RECAP

Teresa reviews the results from last night’s American Idol, including Jordin Sparks’ favorite song which is coincidentally the same as Adam’s – Hanson’s “Mmm Bop.”

9:42AM – CRANK YANKERS

Adam plays another classic Crank Yankers call.

9:55AM – ADAM WRAPS UP THE SHOW